My Why

I'm still continuing to follow WW but I'm not losing much.  However, that could be due to the fact that we are still going through our renovation so I'm not eating as well as I could.  We also had Thanksgiving (from Sprouts) and a couple really nice dinners out.  Over the last two weeks I'm only down .2 but I guess it's better than being up.  I also didn't make it to PF last week at all but I'm rectifying that today!  I'm hoping to meet with the personal trainer today to get a good plan in place.  I'm sure he's going to ask me what my goals are and that got me thinking.  I've heard so many times you have to have your "why" before you can even think about setting goals.  So...here's my why:

1.  Feel and look better in my clothes
2.  Keep up with my husband when we go hiking
3.  Ride my bike without it being so hard
4.  Have more energy
5.  Feel stronger
6.  Live a longer and more active life
7.  Not be limited by my physical abilities

In order to fulfill my "why" I need to lose weight and build up my endurance, stamina, and strength.  This means I need to follow a healthy eating lifestyle and exercise on a regular basis.  I've been getting my steps in but I haven't really been exerting a lot effort in doing that.  I need to push myself in order to improve.  I need to apply some dedication to reach these goals.  Also...having my kitchen back will make it easier as well - they are supposed to finish up either tomorrow or Wednesday.  I'm missing my morning green smoothie and I really want to add in more fish and vegetables.

Found this on Instagram the other day and this is the mindset I want!!!

A Couple Weeks In

Well...I'm doing pretty well with WW all things considered.  It took me about a week to figure stuff out what with the kitchen being out of commission.  I actually gained about 3# that first week but I've taken that off along with 1.3# more.  I'm down to 214.3 now so I'm pretty happy about that.  I'm figuring out some low point meals and snacks so that's helping quite a bit.  I really need to be careful about the sodium and I need to drink my water!!!  I'm shocked that the WW app doesn't give you a place to track your water.  Ideally I'd like to drink at least 100 oz a day.  I'd like to get myself a container that holds that much and I can use that to refill the water bottle I keep on my desk.  I think seeing the water visually will keep me on track.

I also joined Planet Fitness last week and I've worked out a couple times now.  I really want to meet with their personal trainer so I can get a good plan to follow and learn how to use some of the equipment that is foreign to me.  I also need to figure out a workout schedule.  I'd love for my husband to come along with me but that's really not his thing.  I hate being away from him but I really think I need to do some weight training to firm everything up as I lose the weight.  I've also been enjoying the red light therapy and the hydromassage.  I'm glad I went ahead and got the higher level membership so I can use the spa area of the club.

Another thing I need to work out is setting up a reward for myself when I finally make it to One-derland!!  I'm thinking a nice piece of jewelry since that is something I will be able to enjoy even when I get down to goal.  I've also wanted a nice pair of boots so maybe that might be a good reward.  While I would love to have a nice leather blazer/jacket I really don't want to invest in a piece like that and then not be able to wear it for the long term.  I am really motivated to get this weight off and get to a healthy place so that is the sort of thing that is in my head.

Bit the Weight Watchers Bullet

Well...I finally just went ahead and shelled out the money to join Weight Watchers officially.  I really want to get this weight off and see if I have less problems with my joints and if this plantar issue I have going on will clear up.  I signed up for the Online Plus program since I really don't want to add another evening away into my schedule.  I poked around the website and watched some of their videos but haven't really explored much further than that.  I was an online member years ago when they had the option to add the online option to your regular meeting membership.  One big thing I notice since that time is that the discussion boards are gone and have been replaced with their Connect part of the app.  I'm sort of missing the discussion board but I'll give it a few more days of trying to figure things out with the app before I put forth a final opinion.  I can always become more active on the WW boards on 3FatChicks.

I do like the way you log your food and since I have an AppleWatch I am able to link my steps directly with the app to get my FitPoints.  I have also linked my Withings scale so that will feed right in to the app as well.  I'm still exploring the website so I can't say 100% how it stacks up against iTrackBites (which is what I've been using to track my food) but I'm hoping that since it costs considerably more I will find some value for that money.  So far the items I've tracked have come up nearly identical on the WW app but it is much easier to use and search for items.  I also like that I can put information on either my computer or the iPhone app and it will sync to both places.  I did figure out that to get my steps to sync I have to do that on the app.

One thing I wasn't able to find was the weight chart.  I think I know what I want to weigh but I was curious how it lined up with their official chart.  I did a google search and found one on a third party site that stated it was the WW chart.  Looks like my range is 123-160.  My ultimate goal is to get into the 150's so I guess I'm shooting about right.

Now...to get some easy to grab snacks ready.  Our kitchen reno starts next week so between eating out and not having ready access to proper food I'm going to have to be careful!  I'll have access to the fridge and we are going to pick up a small microwave this weekend so we can heat up things.  I'm going to do some searching over the next few days for foods that will help during this difficult time.  Leave it to me to start something like this during a time like this!!

Why?!?

I can't believe I'm back here again!  I'm back up nearly 18# from my lowest this year.  It seems like as soon as I let down my guard the pounds sneak back up on me.  Ugh...so frustrating!  I'm still fighting the plantar facia issue so that's bumming me out.  My husband has been gone for the last week and I struggle with emotional eating from missing him.  Lots of excuses, I know.  I think I might be having a pity party but this is a party I'm not having any fun attending!!

So...what's the plan?  I really don't want to juice fast again.  I lose weight but I seem to put it back on again and have nothing really to show for the suffering.  I need something sustainable for the long haul.  I think maybe I need to get back to counting SmartPoints.  My eating is definitely out of control.  I can't seem to satisfy the hunger and my willpower has completely left the country.

I think I also need to figure out a way to get some good exercise in.  I've been getting my steps every day but I'm thinking it's not enough.  I'd love to start running again but this foot thing is really getting in the way.  I have a sinking suspicion those expensive running shoes I bought have caused this injury and that just makes me sick.  I watched a video last night on some exercises to do for it and also that taking a magnesium supplement could help.  I'll run out this weekend and pick that up to see if I notice a difference.

I also have too much other stuff on my plate.  My husband is feeing neglected and I'm feeling stressed out.  Unfortunately I have several commitments I have to follow through on over the next month but after Thanksgiving things will open back up again.

I'm also having menopause issues.  I called my doctor to talk about possible interventions but I'm really nervous about hormone therapy which is what I think she's going to recommend.  I talked to a friend at church and she's on a patch and says it's the best thing ever.  Her family has even said please don't go off the patch!  Besides the hot flashes (the night sweats part is the worst) I am experiencing mood swings, massive bouts of irritability, and I can't seem to concentrate on anything!  I don't feel like myself and I can't stand it.  My doctor wants me to come in for a consult so I need to make that appointment.

Why can't this stuff be a little easier?  Ok...I think I'll party for about 30 more minutes and then I'll need to grab my coat and be out the door.  I think I've overstayed my welcome.

Losing DietBets and Trying New Things

This morning is a little sad because I've lost another round in my current Dietbet. I'm at 201.1 and I needed to be at 192.8 so it's not something I can hop on the treadmill and meet. This is my second 6 month diet bet and the first one I won every single round. This one I've really been struggling and it's caused me to obsess over the scale. I'm trying to move to a more healthy place with weight loss and just health in general.  Not 100% sure how that will look but I'll work my way through it.

I'm still fighting the foot thing and that has me down a little bit as well. I have been able to get in 30-40 minute walks each evening so I'm glad for that. It seems that my running shoes are really causing me problems but that when I put on my hiking boots I'm able to do more. I think I'm going to contact my doctor when we get back from vacation and see what can be done. I'm still doing the calf stretches on the stairs and the frozen golf ball massages but I can't tell if they are helping. No quick fix for this issue is what I've come to understand - ugh!

On the eating front we are transitioning out of juicing and I'm going to try using Weight Watchers SmartPoints program (on my own because they are wicked expensive). I know that I feel better when I eat a South Beach type of diet but SB is way too free flowing for me and I overdo it on portions. However, my research on the WW SP program looks like they are moving more toward a SB stance on sugars and their resulting carbs. They are still really low on the good fat side of the house but I can always use the extra points I earn for fitness (30 minutes of walking is 5 points) to incorporate more fat. I bought an inexpensive tracker app for my iPhone and I like it so far. It's called iTrackBites and it was $3.99. I haven't purchased any of the extra guides yet but I'm thinking about it. Last night I just went through my kitchen and scanned the barcodes of some of the items in my salad and it worked for all of them except the code on the avocado. It was 4 points for the half an avocado I put on my salad - yikes!! See what I mean about the good fats? I was surprised to see that my juices run about 10-12 points each. The fruit is free on the program but I guess when you juice out the pulp it increases the points value. It sort of makes sense that if you are throwing out all the insoluble fiber your body will use the energy quicker but it's still disheartening. I have a days worth of juice still in the fridge and a days worth of juicing produce on the counter. My original thought was to finish off the juices that are already made and then I will peel all the oranges we have left and freeze them - I love eating frozen orange slices on a hot day. However, when I shared that plan with my hubby he really wanted me to juice what's left and continue with juices for another day or so for breakfast and lunch. He really loves the juices and does really well with them. We will still eat a healthy dinner of solid food. Compromise is the name of the game! :-)

I would love to get to a place where I am eating a healthy diet, exercising by doing things I love, and maintaining a healthy weight. I know I will get there but the journey is really hard!

Back Again!

Well...I've really been derelict in writing here.  I've been holding on by the skin of my teeth but have lost the last two DietBets - grrr!  We had a death in the family in early May and it sort of threw me for a loop but I think more so it just gave me an excuse not to do what I know I should be doing.  So...here I sit at 202.5 and I need to be at 192.8 on Saturday to win my next DietBet.  It's not going to happen because that is just not healthy.  However, we are doing another juice fast to rid ourselves of all the craziness we have been eating over the last couple months - we are on day 9 and I'm feeling so much better.  All my bloating is gone and my skin is starting to clear back up.  I'm actually really surprised that given all we have been eating that I haven't gained a significant amount of weight.  I was down to 201.2 on May 5th and then right after midnight that day we got the call no one wants and had to drop everything and head out of town to make some really hard decisions at a hospital.  When we got back I was up to 207.7 so really not that bad considering everything.  Isn't it amazing how you can put it on so much faster than you can take it off?!?

We also are going out of town for a back to back business trip and vacation so my goal over the next month is to get under 200 and then maintain that until we get back.  The absolute final DietBet for this 6 month go around is on September 9th.  I need to be down to 190.7 to win the large pot so I am setting my sights on that goal.

I've also been fighting some plantar fasciitis.  I've never had this issue before and I have to tell you it is really a pain - literally and figuratively.  I went to a local "chiropractor" to have him check things out since I really like to stay away from drugs and I read that your foot has like 26 bones and they can get out of alignment and chiropractic can help.  Well...I've been to chiropractors before and they have done wonders for my sciatic.  This particular place is like no other chiropractor I've been to before - hence the quotation marks!!  I sort of had a weird feeling when I first walked in - it's way too slick (for lack of a better word coming to mind).  You check in and they make you sit in this one chair that is sort of away from all the other chairs in the waiting room - sort of like they are giving you a throne.  Then they take you back to this really large office and sit you in front of a TV and you watch a video telling you what is going to happen next and that if you are willing to put in the work, they can help you achieve your goals.  Then the main chiro comes in and tells you again what is going to happen and if you are willing to put in the work, they can help you achieve your goals.  He asks me what is going on and we talk a little bit about a past back surgery I had in 1994.  Then he sends me off to this other guy who does this scanny thing on my back to measure heat and then does some x-rays.  All through the X-rays he is having me stand in weird positions which I am sure will make my spine look all wonky.  Then after the X-rays this guy gets down on one knee like he's going to ask me to marry him and gives me the same line - if you are willing to put in the work, he will help me achieve my goals.  I was horribly weirded out!!  Anyway...they charged me $132 and tell me to come back the next day to discuss the results and the treatment plan.  Oh...and they are encouraging me to bring my husband with me.  That's definitely not happening!!

So...I go back the next day to meet with the first guy and he shows me some things on my X-ray that I partially expected but some others that seem pretty bogus and I think they were caused by the funky way the other guy had me standing when he took the X-rays.  Things like my neck didn't have the correct curve and one hip is higher than the other.  Then he gives me this really polished folder of materials which includes the treatment plan.  The treatment plan is what finally convinced me to follow my gut and walk right out the door.  They wanted to give me daily care for 5 days and then three visits per week for 5 months for the bargain price of $3,995!!  And...to top it off this treatment plan was one of those form documents that they just filled out the 5 days and 5 months - everything else was standard.  So that tells me that every person who walks in the door gets daily care and then has to come back three times a week for some specified period of time.  My husband is calling it the Church of Chiropractology now.  I did want something for my money though so I did ask for some exercises for my foot - he gave me some stretches for the morning and told me to use frozen golf balls (holy cow those are cold) in the evening and roll them under the arch of my foot.  I've done them for a couple days now and haven't noticed any change but I'll continue them for a few weeks and see what happens.  If this isn't cleared up by the time we get back from vacation, I'll go see our regular doctor.

I also really need to get back on the exercise so I printed off the training plan from Katie at Runsforcookies.com.  I'm doing the pre-work now which consists of at least four days per week of 30 minutes of walking in order to build a habit.  My husband and I walked to the post office this afternoon and my foot wasn't hurting too much so I think I'll keep going with this from now until we get back from vacation and then try incorporating the running pieces to see how I do.  I also joined an accountability group on Facebook that Tamara of tamarashazam.com is running which I'm really enjoying so far.  My husband and I also had a really good talk last night about how he can help me so I'm feeling really positive about things.  I think the hard part is going to be continuing the exercise while on vacation since some of the places we are going are extremely hot and humid.  I'm going to make it a priority to get my walks in first thing in the morning.  I've got to get off this roller coaster of excuses and motivation.

OMG!!!

A card I made a while ago but it represents how I feel inside!!
It's a party with ferris wheels and balloons and everything in my head!  

I did it!!  I made my DietBet weigh in!  I'm now at 205.1 - holy cow!  It wasn't easy but it was worth it!  Yesterday evening my husband and I went on a walk (the last half felt like a death march) around a lake in our town.  I ended up with 16,016 steps for a total of 6.79 miles for the day.  Then when I got up this morning I weighed in and I was at 206.3.  My husband had mentioned yesterday that if I was close that we would go for another walk in the morning.  However, I developed some hot spots on the balls of my feet so I could not fathom another death march so I put on my regular running shoes and got on the treadmill.  I did 30 minutes of walking at 3.0 MPH and then weighed in again.  I was pleasantly surprised that just that little bit of exercise moved the scale that much.

I'm now sitting here happy as a clam and enjoying my first cup of coffee since Monday.  Boy does it taste good in all it's fat-free, sugar-free yumminess!  I'll tell you that if someone would have told me just a few years ago that I would celebrate a weight loss with this cup of coffee I would have told them to go get their head examined!  I would have celebrated with a DQ Blizzard not a boring cup of fat-free sugar-free coffee (and did I mention it's even decaf?!?) - I a much better party animal than that!

My next DB goal is getting to One-derland!  I'm super excited and so incredibly motivated!  Now...back to this amazing warm celebratory mug!  Hugs to all!!

Changes and Disclosures!

Well...I am on day 19 of a juice fast (the last 8 without any coffee at all!!) and I've lost a little over 10# which is great.  However, I have been pretty miserable the whole time.  Not really all that physically miserable but emotionally worn out.  While juicing has done incredible things for me I have come to realize that I need to do something more sustainable and easier on my psyche.  I've done South Beach in the past and have really liked it.  The losses are definitely going to be slower this way but that's ok with me.  I miss so much about eating real food and it's been a huge struggle to either be going without real food while I'm juicing or having another juicing fast looming over my head.  I am finishing off the last of my juices today and tomorrow starts some new eating patterns.  I am definitely going to try to make the majority of my food fall into the vegetable category but it's time for some real food again - you know, the stuff that tastes really good and you have to chew?!?

So that's the changes part of my title and now comes the hard part - the disclosures!!  I've been very hesitant to share my weight on this blog but I've recently realized how much I get from the blogs of people who share where they started, where they are, and how they got there.  Hopefully by putting myself out there I can maybe inspire someone else like I've been inspired by others.  So...here goes...

My history prior to January 2015 when I started this blog is written about in this post:  http://gabbyspersonaljourney.blogspot.com/2015/01/first-post.html.  The highest weight I referred to there was 262 pounds (yikes!).  I got down to 206 on my wedding day and that has been the lowest I've been since 1999 when I got down under 200 for my sister's wedding.  I've already written about how I started to gain some of the weight back after I got married in 2013 and what I've been doing since then.  And that brings us to today...when I weighed in this morning I was at 207.6.  I'm getting really close to One-derland again and my next DietBet goal is 205.5 but unfortunately I have to meet that tomorrow.  I've been struggling the last week on the juice fast by staying right around the 208 mark.  I'm planning on a long walk with my husband tonight and crossing my fingers that some of this latest plateau is some water weight that will come off between now and tomorrow.  However, I'm not completely living in fantasy land - I definitely understand that tomorrow might be my first ever unmet weigh in on my DietBet journey.  If that's the case, I can't promise I won't shed a tear or be sad but what I can promise is that I will not give up.  I have goals and I plan to reach them!!

Here's my plan over the next month to reach my DietBet goal of 199.2 by May 9th:

Follow South Beach phase 1 for the next two weeks and then slowly introduce phase 2 foods
Do not go to bed until I have at least 7,000 steps on my Garmin
Drink at least 84 ounces of water a day (3 fills of my water bottle)

First Transformer Complete!!!

Well...I did it!!  I met all the goals on my first DietBet Transformer!!  I made it by the skin of my teeth (.5 to spare) but I made it!!  I officially lost 24.1 pounds in this six month DietBet challenge.  That makes my total loss 44.1 from my highest weight!!  I'm super happy with this!  And I did it even though during this DietBet I had Thanksgiving, Christmas, a 12 day vacation to Disney/Universal, and numerous business trips!  In the past that would have been an open invitation to putting on at least 10 pounds and most likely more.  The key to my success is definitely juicing and the support of my husband.  I never would have been able to stay on the juicing train without him.

I'm going to sign up for another Transformer right away so I don't do any backsliding.  I'm not sure what day that starts but hopefully it will be this week.  I'm also going to have to really get back into working out.  I have no real excuse for not doing it other than lazy butt syndrome (LBS).  LBS has gotten me into more trouble over the years than I care to admit and I need to banish it from my life!!

I started to write here that I wanted to get to my goal weight by the end of the year but I just did the math and that would be setting myself up for failure.  I think instead my goal is going to be to continue with DietBet on a continuous basis and that should put me at goal around October next year.  It sounds so far away but it seems so much more doable than my normal way of setting goals that usually leave me feeling like a failure.

I don't have the grand total on what I won during this DietBet but I'm guessing I will have about $325 in my account.  I spent $125 to join the bet so that's a $200 profit!!!  I'll have to give some thought to what I'm going to do with my winnings to celebrate.  I'm leaning toward some sort of jewelry that I can wear and remember how it felt to meet my goals.

2016!

This last year has just flown by and I happily got on the scale this morning knowing without any doubt that I would weigh less than I did this time last year!  I'm 22.2# lighter than this time last year but all of that has mainly happened in the last 4 months while participating in a DietBet.  I'm a big believer that once you find your motivator you can do anything.  In some ways I'm embarrassed that my motivator is money - not necessarily getting more (although that's nice) but not throwing away what I have is the stronger pull.  I'll console myself in the knowledge that being frugal is an admirable quality.  Well, that and the fact that I'm getting healthier every day and able to wear clothes that had been relegated to the back of the closet for years.  If it takes something like DietBet to keep me on track, then so be it!

We are going on vacation soon to DisneyWorld and Universal Studios!!  We are definitely foodies so the opportunity to eat at such unique restaurants is not something we are going to pass up.  I fully expect to gain a bit while we are there although I'm hoping that all the walking in the parks will counteract a bit of that and I don't plan to go on a crazy feeding frenzy by any means but I will also not be depriving myself of things I really want.  So...between now and then the hubby and I are ramping up our juicing.  Yesterday was our first full day of juicing (well...that and the glass of champagne we had at midnight) and I won't lie it was a little difficult given all the little extras we've been indulging in.  However, when I weighed in this morning I'm right back where I was before Christmas so I guess the damage wasn't as bad as I had expected.

I've also not been as good about getting in my 10,000 steps per day as I used to be so I need to be more diligent about that.  I'm not really thinking about those steps as aiding my weight loss so much as helping me to become healthier and increase my endurance.  My hubby is a half a foot taller than me so when we go hiking I'm taking more steps than he is and sometimes I have a hard time keeping up.  I'd really like to be able to keep up and not slow him down.  Speaking of hiking - I was surprised on Christmas morning when my hubby brought me a wrapped present.  This year we pooled our money and bought a PS4 so there weren't going to be any wrapped presents to each other under the tree.  This one was extra special because it was actually from his mom.  She gifted me her amazing hiking stick!  I have been looking for one just like it since I used hers while we were visiting them this summer.  The hubby and I went on a long hike in the Smokies and she let me borrow her stick.  It fit my height perfectly and the circumference was absolutely spot on for my hand.  It gave me confidence when I was navigating declines and the extra help my knees needed when climbing up.  I'm really excited to use it this summer!

My health goals for 2016 include continuing to lose weight and to make it the norm rather than the exception that I hit 10,000 steps per day.  I feel really confident I will be back here next year at this time with success!